Sunday, October 31, 2010
I close my eyes too, savoring the moment, when I hear small footsteps above. Jack's face is suddenly right next to mine. I give him a big hug and now my chit-chat is with him. We read a story. Looking outside, the blackness has turned into the deepest dark blue and the outlines of trees and houses are visible. If there is a better way to start one's day, I can't think of what it would be.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
The gastroenterologist wants to put Therese on an even more specialized formula due to the severity of her reaction to my breastmilk. He said that if I cut out the 5 major allergens (milk, soy, wheat, nuts, and eggs), we might, at some point, be able to try breastfeeding again.
Would you? Would you try to do this with no guarantee that it will ever even be a possibility?
Sunday, October 24, 2010
About three weeks ago, I started to see the tell-tale signs of milk protein allergy in Therese. The red blotchy skin, the blood in her diapers. I have been dairy and soy free for 2 weeks now with no improvement. In fact, her symptoms have only worsened. I took her back to the doctor this week and she said she wanted me to immediately put her on the formula. She referred us to a gastro doctor, who we will see next week. I think the tears in my eyes let her know that I was upset about this, so she said to start pumping my milk and saving it in the off chance that we are dealing with something other than allergies.
Therese did not fight taking the bottle. She just did it. And so did I. And the guilt is back. I gave up so quickly. Is it because I saw Jack suffer too long, or is it because I am so tired? I want so much to just enjoy this time with my new baby, but I am plagued by guilt and anxiety over every little thing. I pray and ask God to take away these feelings.
So, I need some words of wisdom and of comfort. I want to hear that everything is going to be OK.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Three years ago, I noticed this same set of symptoms develop in Jack. It was the beginning of a long road. I know it will not be an easy road, but God never promised the path would be easy, now did He? Believe me, I know that there are much, much worse things to be facing. In the grand scheme of things, this is small. But it is happening to my sweet baby.
Pray for me, will you? I will be eliminating all dairy from my diet once again for the sake of my child. Oh, how I will miss the cream in my coffee!
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Mary Therese was welcomed into the Christian Community on October 3, 2010. I am just now sitting down to write about it. We were so blessed to have so many members of our family join us for her Baptism. My sister and her 2 daughters came for the weekend. Tony's mom, his brother Jim and his daughter, and his sister Leah and her husband all drove down early Sunday morning to join us. But best of all, Sophie flew in from college!The gown she wore is fast becoming a family heirloom! My mother had each of us baptized in this delicate white gown. All my children have also worn the gown, as well as most of my sisters' children. I love traditions!
Therese also wore something new--beautiful crocheted booties--a gift from her Aunt Suzy. Suzy also gave her the cutest bloomers to wear underneath, though you can't see those in the picture!
My parents are Therese's godparents, though they could not be with us. Sophie and my brother-in-law stood in for them.
Our priest had such beautiful words for us during the baptism. The point he repeatedly made was that raising a child to be a faithful Catholic is not a task to be taken lightly. This is serious stuff. And I believe him whole-heartedly.